Singles Suite

March 24, 2012

Single and Waiting Step 3: Don’t be a Saint Hoarder!

Spiritual Hoarding

       — Shanique S. Francis

Last Monday, I began studying for my midterms, but felt that my time would be better spent channel surfing; I am a procrastinator, don’t judge me! While time wasting, I came across this television show called Hoarders on the A&E channel.

Have you guys seen it? It is about people who hold on to things, or “junk” I like to say, and believe if they get rid of anything it will be the end of the world as they know it.

These people get very emotional when the cleaning team throws out a dead animal or a rotten piece of fruit, as if they were burying their loved ones. As a realist it was painful to watch, I wondered why they couldn’t just go to the bin and throw it away.

After pondering about the “weird people” on Hoarders, I finally got it. There are many different things in our lives that we cannot let go. It may be a theatre stub from your favorite movie, a marble from your childhood, or a Burger King crown that you “borrowed” from your baby cousin. But what I found interesting is that, as Christians, we have trouble letting go of fellow saints.

The Bible says in Mathew 22:39 “Love your neighbor as yourself,” and who would you call a neighbor other than Sister G who sits next to you in the pew or Brother P who plays the keyboard. Right? But the bible said love your neighbor, not never let them go.

But as singles are we “hoarding” other single believers? We always talk about being unequally yoked with unbelievers but are we yoked with the right believer? This question floored me as a current situation came rushing back to my mind.

I am what you call a Church Poster Child: I grew up in the church and all I know is church. As a teenager the guys at church were too old, too young, or too platonic.

A few years back I met this guy, I’ll call him Mr. P, and we became good friends. The hoarding then seeped in guys, no matter what this guy did or said the only thing that was on my mind was that he was single, he was a Christian, and maybe he would change and it would work out. I would ask him “So tell me, what do you look for in a girl?” His answer was, “Long hair and a large bust line.” I also asked him, “What is your idea of a good date?” His answer was, “Going to the beach and making out.”

How did I feel about these answers? I thought he was just immature and that he would change in a few years; so blind. But readers, I finally got wind of his verbal jabs, his selfishness, and how inconsiderate he was of my feelings.

If someone doesn’t know how to be a friend, how will they make a good partner? It was extremely hard, but I walked over to the bin and threw that situation away.

I know that as believers, you feel a sense of familiarity when you meet another saint. You instantly share something with this person. But be careful, because they are still human, and they can act as “junk” in our lives.

It could be that they are not where you need them to be, they have not yet OWNed their issues, or they are not who God chose for you. I have no clue what category to put Mr. P in; but I can admit that sometimes I am a Saint Hoarder and that I forget to follow my steps, especially when the person is a believer.

So folks, try not to give a believer a “Free Pass” or to be a Saint Hoarder. It’s hard but seek God and pray in all things and he will direct your path. WORD!


  1. CeCe

    Mmmm….this iz a book!!! Uve left me wit z thowt 4giveness n learning 2 let go! 2 major thngz im battling @ z mo… Cont 2 make urself available 2 b usd by God zeen?, i lovey *hugs* PEACE Out!

  2. Spooscott

    Beautiful analogy Shan & down to earth. You hit the nail on the head & brought out your point clearly. I enjoy each article more than the next. Keeping it real is definately the way to go. I pray with you that God will continue to direct your path & wherever he plans to take you, will come to pass.Continue to bless others through your words.

  3. Risa

    luv it Shan, i 2 am guilty of being a Saint Hoarder among other things, but as u seh, pray bout it cuz they e ot where i need them 2 b, they have not yet OWNed their issues, or they r nt who God chose for me, so i jus gotta keep on prayin hun as do u

  4. Sandrene Hyman

    yet another great article out with the trash indeed sometimes we are blinded by our own desires but God tends to always shows us the light and put us in a place where we find peace of mind

  5. Shanique Francis

    Thanks for your well wishes and and prayers everybody!! I feel so loved!

  6. Kelz

    Another fantastic article this one really hit the core and I did some soul searching too and have to admit that I’m a saint hoarder too and now i know how to deal with it . thanx and please keep writing

  7. Mon

    Love it!!!!! :) i NEEEEEEEEEEDED a reminder and this came right in time Sigh ..

  8. Javi

    Bwoy Shanz mi nah lie! U’ve done it yet again! As in you are so talented at should have been doing this like eons ago! :) Everytime u give me sumn to think about..Luv you hun. Keep up the gud work!!! (Y) <3

  9. PryncessAnna

    Been there, done that & sweet relief! Been growing in Christ ever since with no regrets. Proved “seek ye first the Kingdom of God & his righteousness & all these things will be added unto you.”

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